Rules of engagement : a focus on relationship

There  are rules mostly unwritten that binds relationships and seeks to give the dos and don'ts in relationships.These I termed as rules of engagement in relationships.

Rules of engagement (ROE) originally are internal rules and directives among military forces,they serve as a source of guidance and dictate what measures are acceptable.

I have therefor borrowed this term for easy understanding of rules that binds relationships that one needs to take note off Below are some of them.

1.What you sow is what you reap ,we sow not just for ourselves but generations to come.

If you walk around selfish,not willing to look out for anyone or not willing to consider anyone then don't be surprised when others do same to you.

Sometimes people will never understand the damages they cause others until same is done to them

We need to always remember that,life is an echo what you send,comes back .What you give ,you get .What you see in others exists in you,therefore it is advisable to empathize  with people  rather than be all judgmental .Stay nice even when others don't,radiate and give love not  for others seek but for  one's own seek.Support and applaud the accomplishments of others and as your do you nurture the soil for your own to blossom.

2. The people you gossip with will definitely gossip about you.

Gossip is a nasty disease, a poison that kills relationships. People like to talk and listen to damaging or intimate details information about others to hide their insecurities. 

They point out flaws in other people for validation.

The most dangerous part about gossip is that it steals another person’s reputation which is very fragile, hence destroying something extremely valuable.

It should be noted that gossip destroys relationships and trust.Aside this the parties involve in the gossip will by all means gossip about each other.

3. Your network is your net worth

Networking is marketing.Market yourself well,market your uniqueness,market what you stand for.Everything  you post on social media impact on your personal brand,how you want to be known.Networking is not all about what others can give or do for  you but what you can also for others in your own small way.If you have want to have friends you must be friendly .If you want to your posts like on social media you like or comment on others post .Shading ,trolling and being nasty to people on social media in the name of having fun cannot give you that which you seek.

4. Money matters

Borrowing money form friends or family members is a daisy thing to do because once money is borrowed from such people it changes the dynamics and power balance in the relationship 

People have different attitudes about money and while some may be forgiving when one cannot repay another may hound until you pay up.

One of the worst things you can do when you owe someone is to avoid that person or begrudge the lender.

 Both of you (the lender and borrower) know you still owe the money and not speaking about it makes them feel disrespected.

Most Most borrowers assume that borrowing from friends or relatives mean that,more time can be taken in repaying.However the right thing to do is repay as soon as possible or negotiate a new repayment plan and whiles doing that hold off on fancy new things to avoid resentment.

In addition to the above, be upfront about your financial situation and come clean and honest because more often than not, people can sense when the borrower is not being completely honest or using excuses to buy more time and that makes the nonpayment even worse.

5. Every betrayal begins with trust

Betrayal does not come from enemies but from ones own trusted inner circle.It hurt when betrayed however,that should be the end of the story.

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